When I started studying fertility and natural health, I had no idea what mindset was. For me, thoughts were just the crazy never ending monologue of my life. They came and went of their own accord and I accepted that’s how things were. When I started training to be a coach, the idea was introduced to me that your thoughts could be changed.
Woah, wait a minute! That incessant thought-train of mostly negative thinking could change?
When you start to look at it, it’s easy to see how your thoughts affect your body and your body affects your thoughts.
If you are stressed at work, you can wake up one day and notice you have a really stiff, achey neck or a killer headache. In the same way if you are feeling anxious before an interview, you can end up spending a lot of time in the loo (if you know what i mean?).
This loop between your thoughts and your body is happening all the time, we just forget to pay attention to what are thoughts and body are telling us and carry on with life regardless of how much rubbish we have going through our heads or the random aches, pains and ailments we collect as we get older.
The great news is that once you realise this connection, you can use it as your SUPERPOWER.
You can change your thoughts (crazy I know!) and then you can change the impact that those thoughts have on your body. Once you get to grips with this idea, the possibilities are endless.
Thoughts and feelings are generally what you think about when you refer to your mind. Your thoughts affect your feelings and your feelings affect your thoughts. If you are happy, you are more likely to notice things around you that affirm your happy state of mind and you will think happy things.
FEELING —> THOUGHT
The opposite is true too. If you drive by a restaurant where you had a really good night laughing with your friends, the thought of that evening will brighten your mood.
THOUGHT —> FEELING
These thoughts and feelings help drive the decisions and actions you make on a day to day basis. If you feel a bit low, you’re much more likely to choose comforting stodgy food or chocolate to make yourself feel better and you are much less likely to want to leave the house to move your body (however that looks for you). On the flipside, when you feel great and full of energy, it feels easier to make healthy choices around food, exercise and so many other lifestyle decisions.
Wouldn’t it be great to have some tools so that you can feel more positive, enjoy life and make positive decisions easily around your health and wellbeing?
Let’s have a look at some common examples of thoughts that can easily send you down the rabbit hole. Do any of these sounds familiar?
It’s completely normal and healthy to feel emotions such as grief, sadness and anger. But when you bury them away and don’t process them, they can linger in your mind and come up in your thoughts time and time again making you feel down everytime.
Maybe you have suffered a pregnancy loss in the past that you haven’t been able to process. This grief might hit you like a ton of bricks over and over again when you least expect it.
The what if
The whats ifs are so easy to get caught up with. These include thoughts about the future and about the unknown.
A really common what if looks a bit like this:
“What if there is something seriously wrong with me and I don’t know about it”
You can drive yourself mad thinking about a million different what ifs that may never come true.
I’m sure by now you’ll have had at least one label thrust upon you by your doctor, friend or even yourself. It may come in the form of a diagnosis such as PCOS or endometriosis. Your helpful friend might have chimed in with a helpful comment such as “you would find is so much easier to get pregnant if you just relaxed” (great so I’m a stress head now?)
Your own little gremlins might even be coming up with their own helpful suggestions telling you that if you just lost 10lb you would get pregnant like that. (Perfect, I’m ill, stressed and a fatty mcfathead!)
Do any of these thought patterns look familiar to you? Want to know the great news? It doesn’t have to be like this. I’ve created a 5 day course to help you identify these little gremlins and help you shift them. Fancy joining in?
If you want to incorporate some thought changing activities into your daily life, here are some of the fab things you can do.
Spend 5 minutes writing down in a notebook how you feel. Don’t think about it too much. Write at the top of the paper – How do I feel about getting pregnant? – and just write whatever comes.
Focusing on what is going well in your life is a great way of switching your attention. Every evening before you go to sleep, tell your partner 3 things you are grateful for today and ask him to do the same.
Meditation is lovely way to settle the mind and allow yourself some thinking space. Contrary to popular belief, its not about turning off your thoughts, more about getting caught up with them so much. If you want to try it out, there is a great app/website called Headspace where you can try 10minutes for 10 days for free.
This practice is all about being in the present in the moment, which is something that smart phones seem to make more and more difficult. We are so busy looking at our screens that we forget to look up and notice whats actually going on. Try putting your mobile out of reach for a couple of hours and focus on being present.
Tapping (or Emotional Freedom Technique EFT) is a great tool based on acupuncture points that allows you to quickly let go of stuck emotions and find the root cause of the issue. I have a great little intro here if you want to give it a try.
Visualising is as simple as it sounds. It is taking some time to think about what you want and feel how it will feel to have it. You can listen to a visualisation audio (Circle+Bloom have a lovely free audio) or do something creative like make your own vision board in pinterest or using good old fashioned pen and paper.
Affirmations are short phrases which you can use to reset your thoughts to more positive ones. It doesn’t matter whether you believe them to start with or not. By constantly exposing yourself to these messages they will be ingrained in your head.
Try writing one on a background for your phone.
Ready to get started? Come join me and Positivity – my 5 day course to help you uncover your thought patterns and flip them on their heads.